There's obviously something terribly wrong with the way you live your life. Why don't you take some goddamn responsibility and fix it?
I've gotten really sick of hearing people talk/complain about how life is screwing them. It's a common human behaviour (that I see allll the time) to fuck something up on purpose just to have something to complain about or someone to blame. What a pathetic waste of time.
Of course, I wouldn't be so disgusted with these habits if I didn't still possess them to a certain extent myself.
As of today, my new goal is to perfect the art of living.
My first step is: 1. Complete responsibility. If I cannot control the outcome of an event directly, I can still control my emotional response to it. NOTHING that EVER happens is someone else's fault.
hmm. herman was out of commission for the weekend. broken transie rod. ooops.
tomorrow is hometown. pretty excited to see mike especially.
i can't help feeling the spirit of the season. i've realized that as fall came i decided to gain weight and grow facial hair- truestyle taking my cues from nature. maybe i should hibernate all winter? i wouldn't mind being a bear. great majestical creatures, does anything but nature hold majesty anymore?
i'm going to find a meadow with fertile land, build a house and fields, grow all my own food and drugs and live there without government other than my own. it may end up being in my mind because no such place still exists? this is my latest dream.
i've been thinking more about dying young than ever. not so bad?
La la la, on it goes. work today, fun tomorrow. fun today, work tomorrow.
i did real well on all my midterms (i think) which makes me happy. because i really actually put work into school, and it's satisfying to a degree.
cmon bitches, aint nothin gonna rob me of my ambition.
brenton accused me of not having ambitions the other day while we were hookahing. actually, he roundaboutly did it by saying anyone with ambition won't use drugs(alot). that sonofabitch should know i'm gonna be the first man to fly. if that's not ambitious.. ok whatever i have other ambitions. just they're not normal because i don't want to be normal.
enough of that.
this week went by fast which doesn't surprise me at all. i don't think fall will ever not remind me of bike rides again. not me on a bike, caitlin/allison ADDing it up around campus while i run in between. "i'm gonna try to get all up on that bench" "i'm gonna hit that trash can"
oh my god. i dislike negative people. they can't rain on my fucking parade though, i've got some kinda umbrella technology. mind umbrella.
god i fucking LOVE fall!
Last night I had a dream I ran into a Semi-truck in herman. The moment itself was so indescribably complicated, then all the sudden i was living backwards in slow motion and the pain seemed a million miles away.
I also had a dream I was drunk as hell and threw my cell phone into the ocean.
The other day I put on my wild sunglasses and sat next to the aud drawing people that walked by for about an hour. This is my favorite page, as an experiment for trip materials (they (pictures, notebooks) will be uploaded soon probably).
I got to spend some moneys today like the whore i am.. i thought it felt real good. A whole Twenty dollars at various thrift stores. That's a lot of thrift!
But I still haven't really found a definitive halloween costume. All Neal Cassady ever wears is jeans and a T-shirt, who'll ever get that?
oooHOOOH jesuuuus all work and no play make johnny REAAALL fuckin CRazyliike. I kept on shooting coworkers with my lazer-scanning gunny-thing today at work. (puhchow! geng geng geng geng, pow-pow-pow!) Someone said it gives you cancer!
Then i built the ultimate cup bazooka and killed 2 people. Cause of death: laughter.
halloween is coming. twisted and zonked on halloween? i'll sure as hell try. find me the letter L! speaking of which, i'm either going to be ken kesey, neal cassady, or jack kerouac. i like the idea of going as a beat author. of course you see i'll need the inspiration to truly make a good costume though.
life's been pretty normal lately, and by normal i mean full of holy moments. now. every moment HOLY! HOLY! HOLY!, points if you get the ginsberg.
oh, i've been trying to gain as much weight as possible. so don't be surprised if you see me and i'm like 2 brandons. maybe.
"lets increase our madness this weekend, whatdya say?" "i say you can call me Bo Jack."
I''ve felt very "posty" lately. Probably has something to do with I'm working a shit-ton and never see my friends.
But i like the prospect of getting paid. As some man once said, "i'm a bitch for money." My lab class just made me print out a paper with a bunch of cats on it, ie the first sign that your class is a waste of time.
I don't want to school tomorrow, my entire weekend was work. Tuesday I don't have classes til 3 though, so who wants to help me fit a whole weekend of binging on drugs into monday night?
ha, bing.
When will girls understand i just want to be myself? and fuck them?
oh boy today was interesting at least. my car is fixeed, but i had to get a membership to sam's club to do it. joe, brenton, hamler, and i went back today to nab some massive savings.
I had the best idea day.
Sam's is an adventure everytime, i bought cookies and lozenges- tons of all- Also chatted with lots of people, furniture shopping, "do you have curt-tains?"
Bong rips from the fridge are the best, chilled glass sometimes even rings- excalibur (the bong is named Lady of the Lake now)
October seems real enticing, probably a month that will be spent smoking cigarettes with eucalyptus halls because this cough isn't getting better. Yet.
I found a hotdog on the shelf in Home Depot. Price check?
My car died this morning, again.. so I'm not at class. At least that solves the problem of not being able to pay for parking. No reason to give out this time.. i guess it was just sick of having a battery that works. I have a bad feeling that this will become regular. My computer still doesn't work. I took it in to MSU computer center yesterday and they couldn't help. I'm still broke. I can't sleep well. I feel sick. I don't have any food. I'm still really single.
On the (sorta) bright side I work at 6. I'll probably end up walking, it's only like 3 miles. On the even brighter side I get a paycheck tomorrow.. but the nearest my bank is like a 20 minute drive.
I am a finding fiend. A week ago or so I found an eigth on the sidewalk (with joe and nick) and that was amazingly miracalistic. If that's a word. Which it is now.
Yesterday Joe, Rocky, and I found a bus pass. I'm the only one without, so, bonus for me. Also yesterday, I found a keychain that said "I lost my keys!" except there weren't any keys attached. Soooo ironic.
Party: Tomorrow, 8-? Call me or IM me (if i can get my internet to work?) telling me what you want to drink, or bring your own. Be ready to pay my big sis back at the door ;). Everything else you can bring is appreciated. Be prepared for fun.
102 Tudor Drive, Lansing MI 48906
23 north to 96 west to 127 north to lake lansing rd. Take a left onto lk lansing, a right onto wood st., north past state street, the next right after the green mail boxes are finished, left immediately and right onto Tudor. Park next to the second trailer and call me. SEE YOU THERE!
I did some exploring after job hunting today. First I went to the huuuge park, about two blocks from my house. Then I found the ghetto, about five blocks away.
The best part was this black dude in a brown pimp-mobile sitting at a stop sign, and some white girl cautiously approaching the open window. OOH! maybe i should get a job as a prostitute!
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
strangestlife's journal
protesty
trapped
excited
content
curious
mischievous
crazy
discontent
okay
Eternal